more changes
thursday, october 7, 2010


i tried to keep up the overnight schedule, but with the new term for saxy and kitten, it's just impossible. not only had i gotten back to a split shift on the sleep because i have to watch the baby (which is a whole different level of exhaustion, but has more to do with the nonstop activity of a three year old than the need for sleep), but i wasn't getting even as much sleep as when i tried to split shift before i'd gone to staying up over night. by yesterday, i was exhausted. all i wanted to do was sleep because 2 or 3 hours at a time just doesn't work for me any more. i'm too old for that crap. now, 20 years ago? might have managed. i couldn't write. i was barely functioning. so now i'm going to have to trust that youngest will get herself and her brother up on her own and also not get into things she shouldn't be, sleep through the night, and not be checking on getting the two of them up. she's been inconsistent so far this year, so here's hoping she'll step up.

saxy and kitten are back in school and going to physical classes via kitten's newest bf. so far it looks like the biggest problem is tuesday and thursday mornings. their education is not his priority, so getting them in to class on time also isn't a priority. at the moment, kitten's attitude is that they should just be grateful for the ride, but 10-20 minutes late? come on. being to class on time is important, and there are profs who cut grades for late attendance. and it's a damn good thing hubs isn't in a culinary class this term: those chefs lock the doors when the class starts and don't accept anyone coming in late. i get he's doing them a favor, but there also needs to be a sense of responsibility: i said i'd do this, so i'll do it, and i'll do it on time.

yea, this kind of thing is a pet peeve of mine. no, he's not saying he'll do it then not showing up at all, but he still should do it right.

saxy has a number of gen eds he needs to get through, so i think he's planning to get through those before going back to his culinary classes. he's concerned about them though—he's not done well with gen eds before. i think he can do it, as long as he keeps in mind what he's working for. when he went to school before, he didn't really have a goal other than getting a degree, which really isn't a big motivator. you have to love what you're working for, and most people don't love a degree. now he's working for something he loves. more than a degree, but a career in something he wants to be doing. and that will motivate him to do better. i am concerned about his advanced math class next term, but i'm not that concerned about what he's doing now. he'll need help now and then, and i'm more than willing to help out, but he'll do fine. if nothing else, his goals, his future, will help keep him motivated.

to cover cooking this term, he's going to study peruvian cooking on his own. i picked up two peruvian cookbooks for him for his birthday (which is today! :)), and i've gone through and picked out a few recipes i'm interested in, and he's started going through to see what he's interested in. he'll plan out the recipes for the next 9-10 weeks, and once a week (wednesdays), he'll make 3 or 4 peruvian dishes like he would if he was in class. we had discussed him doing caribbean for the term, but i've had some trouble finding cookbooks that have authentic caribbean food. most are americanized. or cover only one island, which means picking up more than 2 or 3 books, and we can't afford that. i have some books on authentic mexican food (by mexican food expert, rick bayless), a few books on singapore, and a few books on japanese recipes picked out for future culinary experiments, plus one on jamaican and one on brazilian cooking. that leaves about 30 other islands to think about for the caribbean, including the bahamas, haiti, the cayman islands, and so many more. we already have one puerto rican cookbook, so that's covered, but, really, the best way to go would be a couple of books that cover the region overall. i'll just have to keep looking. sometime between now and his next term, i'll try to buy most or all the other books i have picked out for him. his one concern about managing his own studies in this way is getting it "right". i've told him that he may not be in culinary classes this term (or next), but his chefs are still available to him, and i'm sure they'll happily answer any questions he has about what he's working with.

in the meantime, i'm still working on breads. newest project: baguettes. my first two attempts didn't come out so well, and i'm pretty sure what i need is a couple of baguette pans to help with size, if nothing else. we liked these vietnamese sandwiches, but my bread completely overwhelmed the flavor of the meat and veggies that went into them. i've also got to find a good recipe: a light dough that's not too soft in the making part of it, but that's not to dense when baked. and i need to make the rolls quite a bit smaller than i did that last time. they were...HUGE for sandwich bread. lol

saxy is working again tonight. he made $67 the last time he worked, but that was two weeks ago. he was told that the season will pick up and they're just getting started, but i'm getting a bit worried. as much as i'll miss him and his cooking when he's working more, we need him to work more. so i really wish this was a change that would just start happening. i'm to the point where i'm not hoping too much for the ft/p position in january. seems they have enough people that they can't even give their on call people the 3 days they promised. i just can't see there being any openings come january.

most everything else is about the same. youngest is struggling with school, despite having a goal; the older two girls are making plans to move out asap; i'm writing but not selling much. we're managing, but just barely. i'm grateful we are managing at all; i know so many families aren't right now. one thing about the recession: it didn't do that much too us. it was pretty much same old, same old for us.

so i guess not so many changes after all. and what changes there are, are pretty small. unless you're me. getting enough sleep is a pretty good thing, so i'll count getting more than i did in the first few days of this week as a win and a big change. course, right at this moment...i want another nap. lol

i guess, changes or not, i still need to make up from when i wasn't getting any sleep.