so, um, yea, i think we're just going to have to admit that i'm pretty bad at updating at the moment. some of that is busyness, some of that is not having a whole heck of a lot to report, some of that is being out of even a monthly habit, and some of that is just...eh stuff. same old, same old is boring in general, and while i don't mind sharing opinions, i'm not going to turn this into a political commentary,and beyond that, there's not been much going on. except dragon con, which i'll get to very shortly.

weight: still at my plateau that started last winter. just spent several months working on building muscle and trying to ignore the scale and am back to fat burning and hopefully losing. spent a lot of time researching menopause and weight loss, and there are a lot of things you can do to supposedly help, but none work for everyone. truth is, menopause is among the many "women things" that isn't that well researched and we don't understand as well as we could. i could go into a whole rant about how men's things get more research than women's things, but we'll just let that go for now. hopefully things have settled with my body this past year (the hot flashes have reduced, so hoping that's a good sign), and things will get going down again, even if it's more slowly. but even if i'm not quite there yet, i'm feeling stronger, and i'm feeling more in control. there's more to health than weight, and i'll take fitness, strength, and muscle. i'm working on bringing my calorie intake down right now, it's tough though, especially when i'm also trying to meet certain goals with my protein and fiber.

and i'm back to walking for a few weeks. the weather has been overcast quite a bit, but not necessarily rainy, and the temps are going down. i get to do this twice a year, spring and fall, and the time for it is short (6-10 weeks), so i'm reveling in being out there again.

financially, things are still a struggle. saxy is in the midst of a transition from working most his hours at el taco to working most his hours at the coffee shop. the plan at this point, assuming all things work as they're supposed to, is that he'll get a promotion and a raise. he's also still hoping for some time at bold. even if he gets just what he's making at taco, we'd be making more on more hours and the paychecks, hours, and schedule would be more consistent. the downside is no vacation pay, which makes con a little harder. we went this year with vacation pay and we've had to ignore non-essential bills until things stabilize again. this is risky with a few of the bills, but food comes first. and even the food is being cut to keep things affordable. kind of glad we started eating less meat before this. makes it easier to gradually transition than to do a crash course.

the writing is still going. i'm working on a novel i'd set aside 15 years ago because i didn't feel capable of tackling it, the sequel to the one novel i'm still submitting, and re-revising assassin's again to work on the language. i'm not pushing too much on assassin's since it'll likely be self-pubbed and i need time to learn the process plus need to have the funds to do it correctly (editors, a proper cover, etc). as for the novel still on submission, i do have a full out that i should be hearing back on soonish. trying not to hope to much, but this is the book that agents liked and didn't have any fixes for but didn't love enough to rep. i'll be nudging the press again come october if i haven't heard by then.

after con, it's proving difficult to get back into the swing of things, but i'll get back to it. i'm working on small goals and right now it's a minimum of 250 words a day (other than monday, for some reason, writing on monday rarely happens) on one particular project. i can see the holidays looming, but the finances are stretched so thin, i'm doubting they'll make a much of a bump in our regular routines.

now watch them make me a liar. lol

one of the biggest happenings is a fall out with oldest. not really going into it here, but the girl needs to wake up, and most of us who have done what we can support her and her kids financially and emotionally are pretty much done. hopefully one day she will get her head back in the right place, realize that we just got tired of being used and dissed at the same time, and try to mend bridges. at this point, it's out of my hands. i miss her and hurt for her, but she's going to have to find her own way for now.

but the other big happening is that youngest is pregnant with grand child #3 and grandson #1 (yea, they can determine gender with a blood test these days). this was a totally unlanned surprise, and she's not particularly happy about it, but no one has the $700 she'd need for an abortion (and it makes me sad that this would be her first option if we could afford it, but it would also be her decision, assuming she could figure out how to fund it). so the plan at this point is for either herr middle sister or saxy and i to raise the baby. it's leaning more towards saxy and i, which has it's own problems (insurance being the biggest—well baby checks and vaccinations are a necessity), but middle girl and her man are dealing with custody of his daughter, and he's not up to even thinking about taking on another baby even if it is related to jewel. right now, the focus is to make sure froggy is healthy, makes it to her doctor appointments (she's on medicaid), and we're doing what we can to help her have a healthy baby. we've named baby boy, but i'm going to keep that quiet for now. there are so many things that can happen between now and baby born, so we'll wait for that revelation. besides, the middle name is still a toss up. lol

and i know i said i'd write about con, but, you know, that gives me something to write about in another entry. besides, this was a big year for us and taz, and it was so wonderful that it deserves it's own entry. the upside of all the good that came out of the con is that kiddo will be going with us again next year and probably for the full four days.

so i guess there's quiet a bit more than the same old same old going on these days. just took me a couple months to get to it all....