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crazy days done
thursday, december 26, 2013

well, mostly. still have some end of the year/beginning of the new year things going on, but the totally crazy, not getting much sleep days are, hopefully, done. taz isn't back in school until the 6th, but the baking, the cooking, the major clean it all for company stuff is done and gone...thank goodness.

i'm not sure what it was this year, but i really wasn't as into the holidays as usual. i'm pretty sure some of it has to do with not being able to decorate for christmas—our tree is gone, our other decorations (which i really didn't have a lot of to begin with) are all buried in storage—so the house looks like it's any other day. and then there's the kids who aren't kids anymore and sometimes can't (or won't) make it to dinner. and it's been harder to buy gifts the last few years (though we did manage this year some help from the in-laws). this year all the kids made it, but it was...different. big-t's grandfather is in the hospital, and phoenix just got cut from her snap benefits (like one of her sisters, she supposedly had an appointment she was never notified of—i think it's georgia's way of trimming the rolls, to be honest), so they were under stress. and now i'm more in the capacity of grandma than mom, which isn't bad, just different, but couldn't spoil the grandkids (in fact, one of the two late gifts was one of the grandkids...and that one STILL hasn't shipped). we DID manage dinner, which is our one gift we make sure to do every year, and we had the addition of a new guest (youngest's long time bf, kas). it wasn't the best of christmases (to be honest), but it wasn't the worst. it was just...different.

hopefully next year will be better. not just for the holidays, but for everything else. we've settled, mostly; the finances are better, mostly; but things haven't gone so well for the kids and some of my friends this year. the recovery in the states limps along (although, at least there is a recovery), and some of my friends and family have limped along and had their bumps in the road with it. most everyone has weathered the storms, but i know for a few, it dampened their holidays.

and, i don't know, i've been feeling a bit...rundown? the last week or so, i've been frantically moving stuff from one site that is about to close down to another, baking like a crazy woman, cooking all day on christmas day. even my writing was set aside for the moving of stuff and the holidays, and not writing always seems to make me feel more worn out.

it's also been insanely cold, at least for me, even with the damn hot flashes. the headaches are better but still problem with changing weather, and the weather has changed a lot of late. or at least the barometric pressure has. cold and gray has never been my friend, and this year, i actually had an asthma attack after walking in the chill. it took me a minute to realize what was going on, it's been so long.

so going into the holiday rush and bake time, i didn't have much energy anyway, and the holidays, such as they were, and being off routine to get everything done (more than one night, i was still baking at 3 a.m.) took what was left.

and now i'm just glad all that is done. i'm getting back on track, back into the routine of things, back to my exercise (which i had no time for and wouldn't have done anyway since hubs has been home and deserves his time on the telly and so on), back to watching what i eat, and so on. and back to writing. i need to recharge somehow, but been off the diet and exercise for three days already, and i know the weight is coming back on. probably not much, but i need to get back to work on losing it and will be starting at a higher number than i had when i stopped for the three days.

this year wasn't bad. it had its moments, but it wasn't bad. it went fast. now i'm looking forward to a new year, but i'd like to get there with my energy back. hopefully a few days of writing with the crazy down and gone, i can do that.


word of the moment: edental
having few if any teeth; belonging to the order Edentata, which includes anteaters, sloths, and armadillos

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