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just a bump
monday, june 16, 2008

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it's been this way for years, but i'm just beginning to realize we're on of those families where all it takes is one unexpected bump to derail us financially. higher prices in gas, food, and utilities (not talked about but, yea, definitely rising) is only making this more obvious. yes, it's tough for everyone, especially with the disasters happening in other states, but, when you take nature out of the equation, my family is one of those most at risk. we have no cushion to help us if saxy loses his job, we have no savings to take care of sudden needs (washer and dryer, car repairs, etc.) or larger bills that need to be paid relatively soon (saxy's workman's comp is due in august--$800 or more) because we can barely keep our heads above water now. once again we're being hit with disconnect notices, notices we were going to try to avoid with a $25/week payment plan, but that went south when the car needed work just to pass smog...and didn't. it's unregistered and we're waiting for it to be impounded.

we are trying. we went to the gwinnet international farmer's market in hopes of finding lower food prices, and we did on meats and produce. we'll still be buying bulk rice, milk, and a few other things from sam's club, but everything else still needs to come from the grocery store. which begs the question, are we really saving even with all the driving involved? probably, but it is a concern. because we're already struggling, we can't purchase the things we need to grow our own garden and reduce costs even more. it really hits hard since we need to eat better overall--i have high blood pressure, saxy has cholesterol issues, which has been part of what the bentos have been about, but even those may end up having to go as we try to cut costs further just to survive.

i've thought about the whole job thing on and off again, but the issues surrounding that haven't changed and now we have the additional problem of layoffs in almost every area of business. i doubt, between age, lack of experience, and health issues, i could even get myself at the head of the applications pack if i could even find something i'm capable of doing.

we've been very lucky with our landlord. he does work with us, but i'm sure there's only so far as that can go. we need a month off so we can take care of the car, the washer and dryer, shoes for the kids, and so on, but there's no way he could do that even if he would. i'm trying to work in the dark more so we can have the cooler on, but i still may need to cut that down. it actually works for me, but i'm rarely upstairs, and the cooler doesn't seem to do more than make the downstairs cool and the upstairs just barely tolerable. my kids' rooms are up there and it's been hot even at night. i'd open windows except we have no screens and the forest in our back yard has turned it into a mosquito haven.

it's already hard enough that we're so close to losing utilities. it's even more scary that we're a paycheck or two away from being on the streets. and it's frustrating that nothing we do seems to fix it. we're trying to figure out ways to cut back even more, but there's little we can cut any more. and i'm really tired of it. again.

really make me wonder who we pissed off in a past life.


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word of the moment: incandescent

emitting light as a result of being heated; characterized by ardent emotion or intensity or brilliance
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