yep, my oldest is now married. against all better judgment and wiser heads, the girl and her newest fiancéwent to the justice of the peace today and tied the knot.
one thing is for certain, i definitely raised some strong minded, strong willed girls.
was i able to attend? no. did i know about it in advance? yes. have i met the young man in question? once. i met each of the previous fiancés once as well. have i been able to form an opinion about him? not really -- he was really quiet and i'm sure there's more to him than "yes, ma'am; no, ma'am" and a little laughter. at least his name should be easy enough to remember since it's the same as saxy's.
okay, so enough with the snarkiness (which is, honestly, no reflection on the young man in question).
kitten mentioned this whole marriage thing a couple of weeks ago. the problem, for her and the new husband, was that they were about to be stationed in separate place -- her in kentucky or some such place (yes, i keep forgetting where -- i've been a tad overwhelmed with life in general of late, making my 5 minute memory lifespan a tad shorter than usual), him in hawaii. the only way to prevent this (if it can be prevented at all) was to get married. however, the two of them have been dating maybe for a month or two, known each other only a little longer, and kitten's track record with fiancés isn't one i'd call the best: 3 in the last year and a half alone.
when kitten told me what they were thinking of doing, i expressed my concern. they are young and haven't known each other long. it's unfortunate, but the odds are stacked against them just for those 2 factors alone. add at least my daughter's instability when it comes to men, and it just doesn't look good for them. but, of course, i got that "it isn't always like that!" you know, the whole teenage "it won't happen to me" thing. so i pretty much knew this was going to happen.
i have to admit, i'm a bit upset with the way things have become so skewed for me and my oldest. not in our relationship -- other than her trying to "protect" me by hiding a few things now and then, we're good. but i've had to miss a lot of those mom and daughter things with her -- shopping for the prom dress and getting her ready to go, graduation, and now the whole wedding thing. there was no way we could make it down there -- our car isn't as sturdy as we'd like it to be to risk such a trip again. with the way things are between me and girl #2, i doubt i'll get these opportunities with her either. i don't know why i would expect me to have some of those traditional experiences with my children -- we've never been a traditional family in any way, but they would have been nice. i might still get them with the youngest, but i don't think i'll hold my breath on that.
anyway, i spoke to kitten a little before they went to the j.o.p., and received a text message later (and, no, i wasn't too happy with that either -- an actual phone call would have been much nicer). i feel very off kilter here -- not really depressed so much, but definitely a bit more off than usual.
his folks are supposed to make it out to see them tomorrow. with any luck, she and the new husband will come up to see us on sunday. the plan is for us all, including jewel, to go out to dinner, then to leave jewel with the kiddos while us married couples go see a movie. that last bit may not happen because of money issues on all sides, but we are going to manage the dinner at the very least.
maybe the husband will relax enough for us to actually get to know him a bit.
