just shoot me now
friday, february 3, 2006



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and put me out of my misery.

i would say the day sucked, but i was unconscious for most of it. this morning i developed one of my bad migraines. from the get go, it made sick to my stomach and made me sound sensitive. i'm still fighting the sucker because my migraine medicine isn't making a dent and i have 2 hours before i can take any more. as for this morning, i dosed up, took a unisom, and passed out for a few hours.

(on a side note, my cats are evil. when saxy stays home and lays on the bed, they lay down with him. when i stay home and lay on the bed, nary a fluffy tail or whisker can be found! brats. i'm insulted.)

i actually felt okay when i woke from the long nap, had a little lunch, played a little star ocean, then nearly jumped out of my skin when taz knocked on the door to come in. getting up was a bad idea and brought the sucker back. since then i've been dealing with him humming away and talking to himself the way he does and trying not to get too mad because my freaking head hurts. he understands mommy isn't well, but can't quite control this spin/hum/chatter thing he does.

add to that saxy is stuck in traffic and now almost 2 hours late picking froggy up. since she's on a district transfer, we're under warning: one more late pick up after this and her transfer will be revoked, sending her back to the school i'm actually not all that comfortable with her going to. i've called saxy and told him that he leaves work no later than 2:30 from now on. he has to be at froggy's school in time to get her. once i'm in a permanent position, we can transfer her to that school and she can stay late with me. until then, we need to make sure to do what we need to do to keep her in.

i just hope they don't do anything because of the early morning drop off, which i was also bitched at about.

really, i understand their position. but today wasn't a good day to deal with it. i'm in pain. it's very hard to be civil when i'm in pain and the last thing i need is to alienate the school staff any further.

and now, saxy just phoned and they want him to go in to talk to him too. talking to me about it wasn't enough. just, ug.

we just need to make it until i have a permanent placement. then froggy can transfer to whatever school i'm at. she can then stay with me in the mornings and evenings until we get a second car, in which case i become her transportation. hell, as much as i hate transferring her around, i'm really hoping to get that long term position i heard was coming up at yet another school, and not just because i'll be employed until the end of the year and be making some extra money while i'm at it, but it keeps froggy with me and us out of trouble.

okay, i'm crawling back to bed. as much as i would like to rant about this whole thing, i just can't handle it physically. hopefully the job stuff will work itself out and all will be well. we just got to make it through.

and, honestly, we usually do. hanging on is one of the things we do best.


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Since July 9, 2000

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