saturday, january 6, 2001
fried

who on earth decided that being a woman should be so expensive? and being a big woman is an excuse to be more expensive? yesterday i was nearly broke, today i AM broke. i mean clothes, shoes, feminine things and cosmetics are insanely over priced! and an almost "required" part of being a woman in the real world. whichever male decided that this was a necessary industry is making a TON of money. i feel like someone who walked on a car lot and suffered sticker shock.

take cosmetics for example. now i haven't worn much of anything for some time. no point to. i go out to get groceries and otherwise play on the net in my house. makeup hasn't been much of a priority for the last 18 months. so, even if froggy hadn't decided to see what it all would look like mixed together in one multicolored palette, i would need new stuff. and i would need ALL of that stuff. so off i go to one of our cheaper stores that has the variety that i am looking for. after all, i need to match my skin tones and all that. i didn't get any of the fancy cover-ups or tone eveners or anything, just foundation, blush, eye shadow, liner, mascara, lipstick. you know the basics. and what did i shell out for the privilege of hopefully keeping men from running screaming? $60.00. SIXTY BUCKS! this is without (meaning NO) extras! after picking my jaw up off the floor from that one, i'm off to get clothing.

i now officially hate shopping. they say women graze when shopping, flitting from place to place, comparing looks and prices until they find the "perfect" item. men however, hunt when shopping. they know they need a shirt, walk in the store, see a shirt, grab it and bag it.

i am becoming a hunter.

i am a big woman. most the clothing in "affordable" stores are basically tents, some with some shaping, adding a bit of color, but tents none the less. to get REAL clothes a big woman has to go to a big woman's store . . . and pay twice the price. undergarments for a week (and i mean literally 7 days) cost over $150 . . . ON SALE! to add insult to injury, almost everything in season is in shades of brown, with some blue thrown in, black and white. i don't buy brown. i AM brown. brown face, brown arms, brown legs. just plain brown all over. put me in brown clothing and i cease to exist. so i bough primarily black and white. the blues were generally too pastelly and mostly in stripes. stripes don't look all that good on me either. there were NO dresses. thank god the skirts were all long. to get 4 outfits i had to scour (several times) through two different stores, not find the "perfect" blouse but just to find one i could tolerate. thank goodness that the stores were in the same mall and the mall wasn't as bad as i expected.

at least i am finally set up to go in to my first classes on monday. may not really be ready personally, but i have all the necessary tools.

i am totally fried. hunting is a lot more work than it seems.