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saturday, april 3, 2004

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my brother told us to look at some houses and dream and boy did we. but, relatively speaking, they aren't expensive dreams. houses out in georgia are soooooo cheap! i couldn't believe there were nice, and i mean really nice, 3 bedroom/2 bath homes going for just over $100,000. add to that most of these homes have fenced yards worthy of being called a yard, master bedroom suites, fireplaces, and and and STUFF! and rentals start at around $785.

in california, owning a home is a dream, particularly for people in my and my husband's position. in georgia we actually have a chance of really owning a home. i almost cried when i realized that. i've wanted my own home since i was a little girl. i'd given up hope out here.

i'm feeling a lot better today. i handed over the management of dii to the young lady i'm "training" to take over in case my books do sell and do well. (last thing we want is a bunch of fans signing up because they see me running or associated with the group.) apparently taking it easy is what i've been needing. my energy is finally back on the rise and i actually feel like writing and critting again. it only took a week during which i slept A LOT. as silly as it sounds, it looks like the move, despite being 3 months away, just took every last little bit of reserve i had left and then some. seriously seemed silly to me considering we're packing maybe a couple of boxes a day and there's plenty of time to work out all the little of details, but i guess you never know what's going to finally be too much, especially when you tend to be carrying a lot in general.

yes, i finally admitted to carrying a lot. i don't usually see it that way - i do what i have to do. i mean, life is what it is, right? you do what you can to make it better and do what you need to to get through each day. to me, being who i am, having the circumstances in my life that i do, just is. so, to me, it's not a carrying a lot, it's just what it is and i deal with it. (so, don't expect me to go admitting i carry any kind of heavy load in the future either.) but apparently, even when you don't see what you're doing as all that significant, well, there are times when your mind and body just say, "enough is enough" whether you want them to or not, and i pretty much hit the wall with this move. i just hope i don't become a basket case in late june when the pressure's really on!

next week my oldest will have a little get together with friends to celebrate her birthday. it's a bit late but between when we get money and competitions, it's the earliest possible date. now jewel wants a birthday get together too, after being warned that it just would not be feasible and that we're doing this in part because phoenixcat is staying here when we go. we reminded her about all that and got the but-buts again. god, she's driving us crazy. we tell her not to get involved with things because we are moving and she but-buts and whines and cries. she does this with everything. "no" is not an acceptable answer. and we don't just say 'no', we explain, and still she whines and begs and argues. i don't remember phoenixcat being quite so bad. regardless, i hope she stops soon. maybe the move will be good for her in that way too - we'll be able to afford a little more for our girl who apparently wants the world.

this move is really happening. i have a nearly empty desk, empty shelves, cd's and dvd's are packed away (most, not all) and so on. i'm looking forward to it. it will be good for all of us. i just hope my expectations aren't too high. still, mcat is doing a good thing. i need to make sure he knows it.

goodness, it's going to be so strange seeing him again! last time we saw each other he was 12 and short and i was 16 and thin. times certainly have changed!

site of the moment:

ring/clique/fl of the moment:
in the wild
word of the moment: peripheral

of, relating to, or forming a periphery, originating in a periphery, marginal; located away from a center or central portion, external; especially located at or near the surface of the body; of, relating to, or involving the surface of the body; of or relating to the peripheral field (as in peripheral vision)


Since July 9, 2000

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