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friday 08.11.2000

ok, so i missed a day or two there again. i thought about it, but with emce over on his 'weekends', its just harder to get anything done. one i want to spend time with him, and two, he has a game he likes to use on the computer. the kids computer can't handle his game like this one can. in fact, the kids computer can't handle it at all. so, i let him play on mine a bit. everyone who knows my protectiveness over my dell can now gasp in shock. so, his days here, until all his days are here, will generally interrupt my regular schedule. paydays are the exception. he has to take off to get his check, which gives me a chance to get on here and write. other than that, thursday through saturday, just don't mind me. peek in to see if maybe i managed something, but don't hold your breath.

not that there's much for me to say here today. i am tired. i have been tired all week. and tired isn't conducive to writing. i think all the stress of the past few weeks is finally starting to catch up with me and just wiping me out. even right now i am trying to resist a nap, and i slept just fine last night. i would have to say that for once i got pretty darn close to the requisite 8 hours, and i KNOW i slept longer than my usual 5. so i should be fine. but i feel TIRED.

i need to figure out a way to wake up soon too. emce is starting a new "weekend routine", and we have company over for supper on friday nights. that's tonight. so i have got to wake up enough to be a coherent hostess. right now i am just shy a brain fry. fortunately these are all people who know what i have been going through (and are very supportive of the saxy toss out) and will therefore be somewhat forgiving if i seem a bit off. perhaps i won't need to be too conversant. doug always makes me laugh and can usually carry a conversation all by himself. maybe i'll just let him take over with his silly stories and just enjoy myself. m is cooking, so i am off the hook there.

what i really want is to get my ad&d campaign running on saturdays. i really miss gaming, so much so i am willing to gm just about anything just so i can play. course, when we finally get this going don't expect too many saturday posts. we'll be busily defending the game world from the evil plots of the lich demigod, leaving no time for saturday posts here. unfortunately most my players are still running around doing other things so it may be awhile before we get started. i need to locate at least 2 more players to participate as well. right now there are 3, 4 if you include me. parties that small tend to be somebody's lunch. but i am hesitant because role players are a weird bunch, and if they don't get along with the current group...well, they may be lunch anyway.

damn i ramble when i am tired. i just hope all this stress works itself out quickly. i have a life to lead, school to start, and a business to pay attention to. tired is unmotivating, i get nothing done.

speaking of nothing done, the pawn shop wouldn't take my stuff. i guess i have non-sellable stuff, even the jewelry was rejected. fortunately, my man is a knight in shining armor, of sorts, and gave me some money to buy groceries with. now, i just have to survive until the child support gets here, then i get to play catch up. joy.

i think i am going to be tired for a bit longer.

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