i have a very good excuse for not writing yesterday, and not just because it was
friday the 13th. my youngest came up missing. a bit of history that leads up to
yesterday's mess first. last summer i knew i was going to have a bit of trouble
dealing with the younger two kids school schedules. they get on the bus in the
morning at about the same time, and off to come home about the same time. they
are even on the same track (we're on year-round), so the month they have off they
have off at the same time. problem is, his bus comes to our curb out in front
of our house (because he's special ed), and hers is around the corner on the next
block over. he's 8 and differently-abled, she's 6 1/2. add to that we live in
one of the WORST neighborhoods and you see the problem. i didn't want her going
to and from the bus alone, but i have to be at the house to meet his bus and he
most definitely cannot be alone. mind you, at the moment there could be a 10-20
minute difference in bus times, but if his is late and hers is early, there's
no way for me to do it. there just isn't two of me. i tried requesting that
she be transferred to one of her sisters' schools so that the older sister could
walk with her to and from the bus. no go. the school district gave the excuse
of "no room" (which is bogus because in california schools there isn't
any room ANY where).
being a resourceful person, i asked dad to take her in in the morning, and had
the oldest girl bring her home in the afternoon. that way, no matter what happens
with the busing, she is in school on time for breakfast, i don't have to split
myself in two and she gets home with someone in the afternoon. this worked until
teacher conferences. for a week and a half, they have been coming home over an
hour earlier than big sis. so, there has been no choice but to have her walk home
alone. i'm not happy with it, but by NOT transferring her the school district
really has given me no choice. still, she generally manages to get in before her
brother by a few minutes, always comes over and gives me a hug and shows me the
miscellaneous papers that seem to be required by the schools. and ALL my kids
have been told they are to come straight home from the bus. i am not, however,
totally unreasonable. i know buses can be late, can break down, etc. so i give
leeway when a child is late.
yesterday the youngest was a half an hour late before i called anyone, expecting
to hear there was a busing problem somewhere. the school reports she is not on
the grounds and that they know of no bussing issues for her route. so i call transportation
and they say not only is there no bussing issues, but she was dropped off at her
stop at the appropriate time. i flipped. emce was here and i told him she was
missing, and he immediately went out looking for her, covering an area 7 blocks
by 2 blocks, every street, every alley. i call dad in an absolute panic and leave
a message on his pager. saxy calls while i wait for the call back, and he knows
i am in a panic. when i tell him, HE flips out. when we got off the phone, he
called the police and had to get off the dispatch board because he was breathing
so hard everyone was afraid he'd hyperventilate. dad calls and is already in the
city where he works (an hour away), he calls off work and heads on over.
by the time the police show up i am a basket case. no one has seen her. emce can't
find her. i kept walking out to the front lawn hoping she would run up and give
me a hug. i was a hysterical wreck and it was all the officers could do to get
anything out of me. filing the report was a nightmare and had to keep going to
find information because my mind was literally blank on what they wanted to know.
within an hour, 4 officers were canvassing the neighborhood with pictures of her,
police dogs were searching for her, neighbors were on the look out for her. dad
got here, and i suddenly realized that the second girl was also late. he made
the calls and managed to dig ner up: she had missed the bus and was getting a
ride home with a friend (whew! two in one day just would have destroyed any sanity
i had left). the oldest came in and was extremely upset, running to any of the
so-called friends my kids talked to on occasion, but also not getting any luck.
officers searched the house, twice, to make sure she hadn't snuck in and was hiding.
then the police helicopter went up and they were calling her name over and over
as they flew over the neighborhood. turns out my girl had told the mother of a
friend, the ONE friend we had no address or location for other than a vague "a
block or two that way" or phone number for, that she had permission to go
visit with her friend over at their house (NOT!). this woman didn't ask her where
she lived and come to ask me or get my phone number, and i didn't have hers. she
heard the helicopter calling my daughter's name and came out to find out what
was going on, then took the officers and dad to her house to get my daughter.
she had been missing for nearly 3 1/2 hours. when she came out of the car and
towards me she thought she was going to be spanked, but all i could do was hold
her. i held her for an hour or more. then she went to others who were worried
about her and hugged them and apologized. she became very upset when she realized
how upset WE all were, and nearly cried herself when told that mama had been crying
because she was missing. i doubt she will do anything like this again any time
soon. she clung to me for hours later...and i was very tempted to take her into
bed with me just to be sure she was here and ok.
the police did an incredible job and responded quickly. they worked very hard
to find her and to keep us all calm (not that that worked too well with either
me or saxy apparently, but they tried). and the response was amazing. first there
were two police cars, in a half an hour two more showed up, shortly after that
one left and another showed up, then two more. and ALL these officers were hunting
for my girl. we may not see them too often on an everyday bases in this neighborhood,
but when you call they come running. i want to thank the officers, and all police
officers who come running for someone else's kid. your work is appreciated more
than you know.
she's home now, and things returned to normal fairly quickly. i still have to
hold onto her, and my others, every once in awhile in desperation. and they have
been firmly reminded that they are to come straight home from school. yesterday
almost had me ready to believe in superstition.